10 Things To Do with 10 Minutes Between Classes

It’s happening! Our Spring evening class times go into effect on Monday, April 22!

See the times HERE.

Our schedule is always available and updated monthly. We suggest you plan your classes weekly and reserve classes by logging into our website.

10 Things To Do with 10 Minutes Between Classes:

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  1. Extra cardio (you could row 2k or more in 10 minutes!)

  2. Achy shoulders? A coach is now available to teach you how to use our Crossover Symmetry system for better shoulder health.

  3. Get your nutrition and fitness questions answered.

  4. Hang out and get to know your fellow Ascension Fitness teammates, they may enjoy working on abs with you!

  5. Record your data in SugarWOD so you have it for next time.

  6. Post-workout booty with the booty bands.

  7. Ask Coach for a specific stretch or exercise to help you toward your goals (cardio, abs, booty, etc!)

  8. Get your sleep and supplement and lifestyle questions answered.

  9. Have an injury or something you need to work around? A coach is now available to help you plan your workout so that you can work around your aches. Your workout is supposed to be personalized, that’s what coaches are here to help with!

  10. A coach is now available to take care of check-in, log-in, and membership issues (but you still need to email us if you want to place a hold or cancel [frontdesk@ascensionfitnesseb.com]).

AF Goes AI!

Jack London Square
Oakland, CA

Dear AF / CFEB Members and Friends,

We have an important structural change to announce today.

As you all know, the future, for better or worse, will be increasingly automated. We will be embracing Artificial Intelligence (AI) and automation wholeheartedly.

You have already seen some of what we do, such as using SUGARWOD to autopost our workouts to our website. What you may not realize is that for the past year our workouts have been written by a robot! It is called the Autonomous New Developer Interface, and it uses machine learning and hidden cameras in the gym to self-improve.

Therefore you will be seeing us roll out some additional changes to the gym in the next few weeks. For example, there will be multiple monitors throughout to use AI assistance to help you through your workout, details to follow.

You will also have access to our new app on your device or smart watch (small fee applies). In addition the rowers and bikes will be replaced with a bank of Peloton stationary bikes (you will need an account and a small fee will apply). All of the weights and racks will be removed and replaced with Tonal gym stations (you will need an account and a small fee will apply).

Of course this does mean that we will no longer have much use for human beings during classes, so depending on time of day you may be served entirely by AI, automation and robotics.

The other major change this entails is that each member will need to have an RFID implant which is a discreet microchip placed under the skin of the back of the hand. The implant is relatively painless and has a low incidence of complications such as itching, sneezing, allergic reaction, psychosis, gangrene, amputation, bubonic plague, demonic possession and death.

Techs will be on hand (ha!) during the next week to insert your chip (small fee applies). Once equipped with the chip, you can experience next level services such as supplementation and vitamins automatically administered as suppositories by our roving supplement robot, nicknamed “April”, courtesy of Prestige Labs (monthly subscription applies).

Welcome to the future!

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